Meditation Monday No. 1: The start of something new

.

3" x 3" watercolor, M. Rattigan, copyright 2014

I really want to get into the habit of making meditation something that is a part of my everyday life.  It is unrealistic to think everyday will be a day where I can create that space.  As a person who seems to do well with creating a structure (I’d like to think of it as a framework), I have chosen Mondays—my least favorite day of the week to have a gift of meditation.

Today was a gorgeous day.  60’s, full sun, light breeze.  I sat outside my backyard on a blanket for about 20 minutes accompanied by Jai-Jadeesh’s ‘Aap Sahaaee Hoaa’ (my favorite meditation music) and the sounds of nature. The birds were very vocal today.  I also had a visit from my loyal dog Lily on a few occasions.  The rustling of the wind in the tall grasses of our country garden sounded like little explorers wandering around the backyard.  All of these things were welcomed.

I was excited to have today and this moment.  I had big plans… one was to sit and be.  Then I wanted to have time to create a small watercolor and write.   I did do all of these things, but also found that as I set so many plans, my mind kept pushing into the future: What will my art look like?  What colors and details would I include? What will I write about?  I had to work hard to push these away and remember to “breathe and be… just breathe and be”.

My face itched a lot.  Little strands of hair were tickling my face with the breeze.  My dog laid her paw upon my lap as if to say, “Hey, you are not paying attention to me”.  I did not let these things upset me and I accepted them as happenings. “It’s OK.  I am having a hard time focusing, too”, I told myself.

Somewhere in the midst of thinking about people and things and hair tickling my face, I let go.  I don’t know for how long (does it matter anyway?) but I remember watching colors inside my mind’s eye.  Lots of yellow, orange and a bit of red.  There were concentric circles collapsing upon one another, moving and gathering into a center… an endless center.  I thought of the sun, it’s warmth and the experiencing of centering.  It was a lovely gift to feel and see.

When finished, I stayed outside to create a small watercolor.  I decided to stay with the oranges and yellows that I saw and felt with a bit of red.  I chose green as I sat upon the grass and was happy to be outside in colorful spaces.  The birds appeared in brown.  It seemed as of I was in the middle of their conversation as they sang in stereo around me, and I was thankful for that.